Can three negative IgM tests confirm not having herpes?

Hi doctor,

I had a brief interaction with a woman who is very likely to have STD, specifically herpes, and I have a few questions about herpes testing. The full story is that about three weeks ago, after a bad breakup, I went to a massage parlor. The parlor was the type that is sort of seedy and known for extras and the masseuse assumed I wanted sex and was immediately ready to go. I sort of talked her down to a handjob and the masseuse took off her clothes, straddled my legs, and did her thing while I lay on my back. For about 10 seconds during the hand job, her genital area was pressed against my scrotal area, and she also kissed the shaft of my penis twice. There was no intercourse, and I did not see any herpes lesions on her, but I also was not able to look inside her or get more than a few brief looks between her legs before she was on top of me.

After the experience, I was very worried about having contracted herpes from genital contact, so I got some tests done. An IgM plus a full STD screen at three days after the incident, and an IgG and a second IgM at 10 days after the incident. Everything was negative. I have had no symptoms other than a bump on the inside of my thigh, and I have had bumps before in the same spot due to thigh chafing when I walk. I actually had one on the other thigh before the incident. Currently, it is about 22 days after the incident, and I am planning on getting a third IgM done to be extra sure there has been no change. What worries me is that I have read online that the IgM test is unreliable and that 50 % gives false negative results. So basically, my questions are, with no symptoms, three negative IgM for HSV 1 and 2, and a negative IgG, is it safe to assume I do not have herpes? Is the IgM completely unreliable or are three negatives taken at different times conclusive? And is it fine to continue with dating and sexual activity given my current circumstances? Or should I abstain from sex completely for another nine weeks and wait till I can take a more accurate IgG? I started a new relationship a couple of weeks after the incident, and I do not want to risk infecting her, but I also do not want to ruin the relationship if I do not need to. I also suffer from a generalized anxiety disorder. So, any concrete information you have would be helpful. Lately, I have been having especially bad panic attacks and hot flashes. Currently, I am taking Effexor 75 mg.

Thank you doctor,

So just to clarify, you do not feel that engaging in a sexual relationship at this point would be irresponsible?